


A Bag of Cats for Reindeer Games

by auntieomega



Series: A Marvelish Romance [2]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Incredible Hulk - All Media Types, Thor - All Media Types
Genre: Anal Fisting, Anal Sex, Angst and Humor, Christmas Fluff, Christmas Party, Christmas Presents, Christmas Tree, Ice Skating, M/M, Male Slash, Paganism, Pool Sex, Yuletide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-04
Updated: 2015-05-04
Packaged: 2018-03-29 01:27:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3877150
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/auntieomega/pseuds/auntieomega
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As Loki and Bruce celebrate their first Christmas together with family and friends, a prank gift steals the god of mischief’s holiday spirit, and Bruce realizes dating a temperamental frost giant often means skating on thin ice.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Bag of Cats for Reindeer Games

**Author's Note:**

> 05/04/15 - reposted
> 
> Warning: Back story and other elements combine a hodgepodge of Marvel stuff with Norse mythology, ancient Norse customs, and modern paganism.
> 
> Note: This story takes place a couple of months after Loki and Bruce got together in "Loki Gets What He Needs."

  


Bruce wobbled uneasily on his ice skates. The festively-lit evergreen, the throngs of puffing, bundled children, and the gratingly up-tempo Christmas carols did nothing to soothe his nerves. “I guess this is payback for that throatsinging show?”

“So you’re admitting now that you deserve payback for that?” Loki grinned beside him, his skating as effortless and graceful as if he had been born with blades on his feet.

“You didn’t think it was beautiful and otherworldly?”

“Yes, but after two hours I was wishing I were in another world.”

“I guess it was kind of long-- Fuck!” He nearly fell, but Loki caught him.

“Bruce, this isn’t that difficult.” Loki glided in front of him and spun to face him. He looked as annoyingly poised skating backwards as he did skating forward. “You have lovely balance when you do yoga. You should be great at this. You’re tensing up too much. Try to relax.”

“There are too many people here. I feel ridiculous. It’s embarrassing.”

Loki’s smiling expression shifted to one of deep sympathy. “Give me your hands,” he said gently. Bruce let Loki draw him close. “There. You can’t always be the one in control, Banner. Close your eyes.”

“So I’m going to be skating blind, and you’ll be skating backward? This is a bad--”

“Trust me.”

A little over a year ago, that statement would have been appalling. Who in his right mind would trust someone who called himself a god and attacked New York City with an alien army? But so much had changed since then. Something about Loki had touched Bruce, and he had been unable to let it go. Earlier that year, he had appealed to Thor and Odin to let him rehabilitate Loki on Midgard. But six months of living together had turned them into a couple. And now, only a little more than a month into their relationship, he found it hard to imagine a time when he had not trusted Loki. So, after only a moment’s hesitation, Bruce obeyed.

“Mischief!” Loki squealed, spinning them around rapidly.

Bruce glared into Loki’s beaming face and slipped down, but Loki hefted him up.

“All right, so close your eyes--”

“Yeah, we already played this game--”

“But this time I mean it. Come on. Eyes closed.” He pouted a little when Bruce just frowned at him. “Trust me.”

With a sigh, Bruce closed his eyes and let Loki move his hands from the lapels of Loki’s coat to his slender trickster hips. “Follow my movements,” Loki told him, voice soft and rich as mulled wine. “Flow into me--like sex. Let your body join mine. Just breathe. And flow. Relax. Don’t think about anything but my voice and our connection.”

He gave himself over to Loki completely, allowed his always too active mind to go numb, to operate on only the most basic level—respiration, coordination, equilibrium—let himself devolve into little more than muscle and movement. Somewhere, as if at some great distance, “Let It Snow” hummed overhead and an ocean of crowd sounds roared so softly it might have been born of a seashell. Nothing was so tangible, so real as Loki’s body beneath his hands, Loki’s breath steaming against his face, the quiet crush of steel parting ice.

They pulled to the side and stopped. He opened his eyes as Loki’s hands clasped either side of his head. The intensity of Loki’s expression stole his breath. Sometimes Bruce was bothered by how seldom Loki said ‘I love you.’ But when he looked at Bruce like that, words seemed meaningless.

“I love you,” Bruce offered in a hoarse whisper, struck by the phrase’s inadequacy to communicate the roil of feelings inside him, yet using it nonetheless.

“I know,” said Loki quietly, amazement softening his face, his eyes wide and innocent. “Oh, Bruce!” he said in a breathless sigh that made Bruce wish his name always sounded like that and pulled him into a kiss.

Loki tore away angrily. “I hate this song!”

“What?” Bruce had forgotten that any music was playing.

“It’s that infernal reindeer song!”

Bruce, flushed and hard, tried to recover enough to figure out what the fuck had Loki so upset. “’Rudolf the Red-Nosed Reindeer?’ Are you serious? That’s what has you in such a snit?”

“It’s the reindeer games song,” said Loki, pressing close to Bruce as if seeking protection.

Bruce thought Loki might be joking, but tears had started in his eyes. Bruce hugged him. “Poor Loki. It’s not that bad, is it? Have you ever listened to the lyrics? It’s actually a nice song.”

Loki sniffed. “The only one I’ve really listened to is that ‘Batman smells’ song.”

“Um, that’s not really—let’s just focus on Rudolf for the moment. It’s about an outcast who’s shunned by his peers until his deformity proves useful, and then they accept him.” He paused. “Maybe you’re right. Maybe that is kind of a bad song… I liked it when I was a kid, though. I liked the idea that an outcast could eventually be accepted by the herd.”

“What does that have to do with me?”

Bruce sighed. “Nothing, baby. Your helm has horns and reindeer have--”

“Antlers. Reindeer have ANTLERS.”

“Which are kind of like horns--”

“But they’re not!”

“Why don’t we go home, drink hot tea, and fuck? Huh? Fuck, cuddle, fuck some more--”

“The apartment is so sterile and so full of gray. I want to be here with the Christmas trees and the lights and the happy songs about people with deformities having no inherent value.”

Bruce blinked. “Loki, if you want a tree, we can get one. We can get lights, decorations—all of that stuff.”

“We can’t,” said Loki, visibly drooping, “because you’re waging a war on Christmas because you’re a godless liberal and don’t believe anything.”

“Fucking wow, Loki.” Bruce took a steadying breath. “No, I like Christmas. I don’t think decorating a tree has any religious significance. And I believe in all kinds of things. I believe in love, compassion, reason, integrity--” He smiled. “You.”

Loki rolled his eyes a little.

“Come on. Let’s go shopping.” He gave Loki’s hair a slight tug. “We’ll make this the holliest, jolliest, merriest, whatever-else-ist Christmas an atheist and a pagan god ever had!”

***

Loki lay on the floor with Bruce admiring the result of their labors. Loki was quite pleased with himself. Bruce seemed stunned.

“I can’t believe this is my apartment,” said Bruce.

“I know,” said Loki. “It’s so cheerful.”

“It’s so…sure, we can go with cheerful.”

Loki basked in the blinking lights. “When you decorate, it’s good to have a theme in mind.”

“What theme is…uh…this, exactly?”

“Obviously, the rainbows we created with strands of lights wheeling around the room represent gay pride. And the Victorian ornaments are so lovely, so we had to have those. So, this is Dickens Over the Rainbow.”

“What about all of the peacocks?”

Loki turned to frown at Bruce. “I liked them. They’re beautiful.”

“So, really, it’s Dickens over the Rainbow with Peacocks.”

Loki snorted and got up to rearrange the ornaments on the tree again. He made a few adjustments, then consulted Bruce. “Do the Santas seem balanced to you?”

“Yes.”

Loki stepped back, surveying the tree again. “What do you think about monkeys? Maybe we need some monkeys? Or more bells? Both, maybe. And doves. I really think it needs some more movement.”

“I don’t think that tree will hold any more ornaments.”

Loki sat beside Bruce and pulled the scientist’s head into his lap. “Our first tree,” he told Bruce softly. “Our first winter. Our first Christmas…”

“Tomorrow night we’ll go to our first holiday party.”

“Tony’s party.” Loki couldn’t keep the ice from his voice.

“It won’t be like Thanksgiving. Coulson won’t be there.”

“Good. I don’t like to go to parties with people I killed.”

“What about with someone you love?”

Loki combed his fingers through Bruce’s hair. “All right. First holiday party.”

***

Bruce and Loki hadn’t quite entered Tony’s living area when Thor intercepted them. He thrust a large gold foil gift bag at Loki. Loki accepted it with reluctance and an air of suspicion. He held the bag out in front of him with his arm fully extended.

“Open it,” said Thor. “Come on, Loki. Open it."

Natasha slunk up behind the god of thunder and peered around him. Others joined them.

Loki opened the bag and pulled out a small stuffed cat. He handed it to Bruce, then fished out another. And another. He stared into the large bag and looked up at Thor. “You’ve given me a bag of cats?”

Tony laughed. “Someone really should have been filming that.”

Amid the snorts and amused titters, Thor grinned at Loki while Loki glared at Thor and Bruce wished he had somewhere to hide.

“If this,” said Loki with self-righteous indignation, shaking the gold foil bag at Thor, “is some comment on ergi and my preference to receive men--”

A flustered Thor shook his blond mane. “No, no. It’s funny. It’s because of what Bruce said.”

Natasha smirked suddenly. “That’s right. I had forgotten about that.” She pulled a cat out of the bag and smoothed a hand over it. “What a cuddly brain you have, Loki! Too funny, Thor.”

Thor beamed. “I’m spreading Christmas cheer.”

“Yeah,” said Natasha. “But I would have gone with an atomizer.” She displayed an imaginary bottle and whispered sexily, “Crazy—the fragrance for puny gods.”

Bruce could almost feel Loki’s stomach clench. Loki stared at him with abject horror. “What are they talking about?!”

Before Bruce could say anything, Thor said, “Once Bruce said your brain was like a bag of cats and someone could almost smell the crazy on you.”

“You can’t ever stop being an asshole, can you?” Loki said to Thor.

“I defended you!” said Thor. “It’s over now. And it’s funny.”

Loki bristled, white with quiet fury. “Strangely, I’m not amused.”

“Loki,” Bruce began gently.

“And you! I would expect this from them, but you-- I thought you were different. I thought--” He wheeled away, fleeing a few steps before seeming to realize he had nowhere to run. He stopped in the center of the sitting area and hugged himself with a small, frustrated gasp.

Bruce caught up with Loki and laid a hand on his shoulder. Loki flinched from his touch. “They didn’t mean any harm. It was a joke.”

“How could you say such things about me?”

“I didn’t know you then.”

“You told me you loved me from the moment you saw me.”

“I said almost from the moment I saw you.” He frowned. “You do remember what was going on back then, right? You were kind of being a massive dick.” He realized suddenly how loud his voice seemed in the large space, how quiet everything around them had become. They were the center of attention. “Balcony,” he said gruffly, pulling Loki by an arm. “Let’s take this outside.”

Once they were on the balcony, Loki broke free and put a short distance between them. “How dare you have fun at my expense,” he said, his gaze on the city and as far from Bruce as possible.

“For a god of mischief, you certainly have some tender feelings regarding jokes.”

“I love jokes. Just not when they’re about me.”

Bruce sighed. “Okay. Look, Loki, I’m sorry your feelings were hurt.”

“How could you say those things about me? Me?”

“I thought we covered this already. It’s the past. I don’t think that now. And it wasn’t really all that bad was it? I mean, I like cats. I didn’t say your brain was like a bag of Justin Biebers. Or global warming deniers. I said cats. Soft, sweet fuzzy cats.” He swept a hand like a languorous tail around Loki’s neck and tickled down his collar.

Loki pulled away from him. “But that’s NOT what you meant! Sweet, fuzzy—NO. You--”

“Said something in jest that maybe wasn’t so nice. YOU were invading my planet. Who’s the bigger douche in this equation?”

Loki stared at him with shock-widened eyes. “You just called me a douche.”

Bruce buried his face in his hands with a groan. “Fucking hell, Loki. You’re the god of melodrama.” He took a deep breath. “I don’t want to do this now. Let’s call a truce, have a drink. Relax. Maybe try to remember that we came here to have fun?”

Loki flicked a cold gaze his way. His face was grim and tight, his eyes narrowed. “I don’t want to do this ever. This was all a mistake. From the very start—a mistake.”

“What are you--” Bruce could only stare for a moment. “Are you breaking up with me?”

“I would have thought you would catch onto that a little faster, but, yes. It’s over.”

Bruce wanted to laugh, but couldn’t. Nothing in Loki’s demeanor suggested this was a joke. “You’re serious?”

“Yes. Absolutely. Deathly so.” 

“This is how you want to do this? Here? Now?”

“What? I’m observing the proper etiquette. I didn’t text you.”

“I can’t believe you’re doing this over a stupid joke.”

“Actually, I’m doing it over an offhand remark.”

For the first time, Bruce noticed the cold. Tiny flakes of snow floated through the freezing night air. Inside, his friends moved about the bright, red-splashed room. The lights, the warmth, the life inside contrasted with the frosty stillness of the balcony where he and Loki stood like statues, like strangers. “You can’t do this,” he said finally.

“I am. I did. It’s done.”

He sank his hands into his pockets. He watched Loki’s face, wanting to remember every beautiful, cruel line of it. Snow had begun to frost the dark hair. He took a deep breath and watched it billow in front of him before speaking. “I understand you’re hurt and angry, but everything else has been so good. You can’t just throw that away.”

Loki pulled his arms across his chest in a gesture somehow very reminiscent of a black and white era starlet adjusting her mink stole. “It’s not as if it’s been a long time—almost two months. That’s nothing even by your gnat-brained human standards. To me, it’s been less than an eye blink. I’ve taken longer picking out socks.”

“I should have seen this coming. You almost never tell me you love me.” He shrugged and pulled his hands out to blow on them. “Because you don’t. For a god of lies, you have an endearing honesty about you.” Loki looked at him, but said nothing. Bruce huddled against the railing. Silence deepened as the snow fell. Finally, he said, “If this is what you want, I’ll stay here tonight. You can gather your things at the apartment and sleep there. Stay there as long as you need to. I’ll figure something out.” He closed his eyes and tried to think quiet thoughts.

“Bifrost,” said Loki, sighing. “Fuck. We need to talk.”

“You need to leave me alone now, Loki.” He fought to tame the harshness slipping into his voice. “I want to be civil and adult about this, but there’s a part of me that wants to crush you in my arms and forbid you to leave—and I have a feeling that part’s green.”

“Bruce,” Loki drew closer.

Bruce trembled. “I can’t. Not now.” He hung his head as Loki edged nearer. “I know it’s only been a couple of months,” he said raggedly, “but they’ve been the best months of my life.”

Loki gathered him close and filled his mouth with silver tongue. After a long, luxurious kiss, Loki pulled away. “I love you,” he said with a fierce urgency. “I love you, I love you, I love you.” He snuggled closer, a frenzy of hands and lips. “I don’t say it because it scares me. Not because I don’t feel it. I feel it all the time.” He licked Bruce’s eyes with long swipes of his tongue. “I’m sorry, Bruce. I’m so sorry.”

Bruce kissed him back and rubbed and squeezed him all over. His ministrations drew a very sweet, very small noise from the trickster that sent a deep shudder through Bruce’s body. Loki ground his erection against Bruce’s thigh. Bruce caught a handful of Loki’s hair and tugged his head to the side, exposing his neck to snowflakes and passionate kisses. Loki purred and writhed against him. Bruce teased Loki’s swollen cock with his own, enjoying the cruelty of clothing and Loki’s needy moans.

“Isn’t it kind of cold out here for makeup sex?”

Bruce hugged Loki tight and stared at Tony guiltily. “I…forgot where we were.”

Tony looked at his drink and laughed. “That’s okay. But why don’t you take ye olde sausage fencing into the glass room? You’ll still have a great view, but it’ll be a lot warmer.”

***

Loki surveyed the room while Bruce played with something in the closet. Loki was disappointed to find that the glass room was not made entirely of glass. It looked much like the other rooms he had seen in Tony’s tower--cold, austere and modern with a decidedly masculine bent, but glass only seemed an accent material. Slate and steel predominated.

On the plus side, there was a pool.

“Take off your clothes and get in the pool,” Bruce told him. “I’ll show you why he calls this the glass room.”

Loki obeyed. He let Bruce lead him through the warm water toward the wall of windows and into a nook formed by the glass. “This is a balcony,” said Loki. “An enclosed glass balcony.”

“And now,” said Bruce, pulling him into the balcony, “we’re suspended above Manhattan in a glass bubble.”

Loki pressed against the cold glass to watch the snow falling. He could almost feel the frozen night pressing back, the glittering lights of the city like thousands of pitiless eyes. As he stood there, naked, some part of him wished the thousands of mouths that must live beneath those eyes would fly at him with their razor-sharp teeth.

He closed his eyes with a sharp inhalation as another mouth, a real one, chewed his hipbone. He let Bruce suck and tug him back to reality, let Bruce peel him from the dark glass. He pushed his fingertips through Bruce’s hair. Bruce smiled up at him, then began tonguing the slit of Loki’s cock.

And then Bruce sucked him deep and pulled a soft groan from Loki’s throat. He could feel himself elongating, filling Bruce’s mouth, his body tingling with life and pleasure. He pulled up handfuls of Bruce’s hair. In the midst of his ecstasy, a terrible thought assailed him. “You do know I love you, don’t you?”

“Mmhmpf?” said Bruce, mouth full of Loki cock.

“I love you.” Loki, suddenly beside himself, stroked his scientist’s jaw and stared into his eyes. “That you thought for a single moment that I didn’t--”

Bruce took Loki’s hands and kissed them. “I’m sorry I doubted you.” He nuzzled Loki’s stomach. “It is nice to hear it, though.” Smiling, he pulled Loki down into the shallow water.

Loki laughed knowingly as Bruce pushed him on all fours. Needy whimpers replaced his laughter as Bruce fondled his balls while rimming him with strong, undulating thrusts of tongue. Bruce teased his perineum and mouthed his ballsack, sucking each testicle in turn. Loki writhed and swished his ass from side to side, growing impatient, needing to feel Bruce inside him.  
He grew more frenzied as Bruce, who had had the foresight to bring a tube of lube into the pool, filled his hole with lube and fingers. Loki squirmed as one of Bruce’s hands brushed across his tummy while the fingers of the other stretched his hole. And then waves of pleasure rippled over him as Bruce massaged his prostate.

Moaning, Loki rocked against him in fits of need. Finally, Bruce’s cock thrust inside him. They held still for a moment, and a hush fell over Loki. The entire world, for a moment, became solid and calm. A lowing sound welled up from his depths. Then Bruce began pounding him, heavy and deep, rattling his skeleton and jarring the air from his lungs.

Loki bucked against him, taking him even deeper. “Oh, Bruce, Bruce,” he whispered when he felt Bruce’s hand cup his glans.

A disciplinary squeeze answered. “Not yet,” Bruce panted. “Wait.” Loki shuddered dryly as Bruce’s cum jetted against his walls. Behind him, the water stirred as Bruce rose. Much to Loki’s dismay, Bruce helped him to his feet as well. Bruce kissed Loki’s lips. Loki whimpered into his mouth. Bruce traced up Loki’s cheekbone with a thumb. “Poor Loki,” he said softly. “Poor sweet beautiful Loki.” He smacked Loki’s wet ass. “Now, up against the glass!”

Loki suppressed a giggle as Bruce pushed his face into the pane. “Spread your feet,” said Bruce. “Good.” He caressed a hand down Loki’s spine. “Very good.” He descended behind Loki and planted a kiss in the small of his back, raising chills. “You are very good,” he said gently, slowly lubing Loki’s hole. “You’re far better than you know.”

Loki bit the inside of his cheek as Bruce’s hand slid into him. He winced and struggled to relax. Bruce’s other hand entertained Loki’s erection. The hand inside Loki pulled into a fist. Loki squatted, yearning. The fist plunged deep inside him, pushing Loki up the glass. Bruce began to punch inside Loki’s ass, dragging his body up and down the pane. Loki felt as if his nipples were cutting through the glass while some trapped animal tried to fight its way outside him.

Each thump sent shockwaves of pained bliss through him, danced the skyline in front of him, made his blood flow backwards. Just when he thought he could take no more, he felt Bruce’s mouth on his cock. Loki came with a loud groan, his knees buckling as he filled Bruce’s insatiable mouth with cum.

Bruce, still swallowing, helped Loki into the water. Loki sank against Bruce, luxuriating in his sure embrace. He shivered.  
Bruce rubbed Loki’s back and arms. “Are you cold, baby?”

“I don’t know what I am,” said Loki, teeth chattering slightly.

Bruce hugged him close. “I got the sauna going before we started. Let’s get you warmed up.”

***

In the sauna, they lay on the wooden deck with their cold wet bodies pressed against each other, kissing languidly in the heat. They passed the time in silence, basking in each others' presence. Loki listened to the hiss of steam and the intermittent creak of metal while Bruce massaged the fisting ache from his lower abdomen. His eyes blinked slowly. Love filled his lungs like breath. Perfect. Everything was perfect…

Loki shuddered suddenly, the peace he felt marred by the realization that he had almost thrown this all away. “I’m sorry I was so angry,” he said, trailing a finger down Bruce’s slick side. “It seemed like you had a private joke with Thor. It felt like such a betrayal. So many days in my youth-- And more after...”

Bruce rubbed beneath Loki’s navel. “What do you mean? You were a prince.”

“In Asgard, magic is considered the domain of women. Men who practice it are ridiculed. And, while raping a male foe to humiliate him is fine, wanting to be loved by a man, to assume a passive role, is unmanly. Being a prince means very little when you know no one respects you, when there are always whispers at your back.” He traced Bruce’s ear. “Thor’s friends did more than whisper. Thor, they loved; I was the brunt of their jokes.” He paused, struggling. Even the admission hurt. “Somehow, they were able to take everything I was and make it meaningless.”

“I’m sorry you felt that way.” Bruce rolled his tongue around Loki’s left nipple. “And I’m so sorry you were treated like that. I understand that feeling perfectly.” He kissed the right nipple, then the center of Loki’s chest. “It can hurt so much. It can make you crazy. Bag of cats crazy.” He stroked Loki’s wet hair. “I tried to blow up my high school.”

Loki rose up on an elbow. “You what?!”

“Yeah.” Bruce traced a little heart symbol over Loki’s chest with a fingernail. “I got so pissed I built a bomb. I was angry, jealous, wounded, rash. Despite all of my supposed brilliance I attempted something unbelievably stupid. I wanted to show everyone what I could do—I wanted a monument of rubble to my ego and my genius.” He smiled wryly, his dark eyes boring into Loki’s. “Does any of that sound familiar?”

“But you’re a hero! Heroes don’t blow up schools!”

“I wasn’t born a hero. I became one. There isn’t always a straight line from average person to superhero. Sometimes it’s crooked.” His stare fell, yielded to somber intensity. “Actions have consequences. And that can be a positive thing. It means you never have to be satisfied with the person you see in the mirror. You can always change your actions and alter the trajectory of your path.”

“What happened with the bomb?”

“I had second thoughts and defused it, but I was discovered. I’m guessing if someone in the government hadn’t decided I could be useful, I’d be pacing a little cell somewhere.”

“They decided you were useful. Like Rudolf.”

Bruce kissed Loki’s shoulder and laughed. “I hadn’t thought of it that way.” He outlined the edge of Loki’s lower lip with his tongue tip. “It wasn’t on a whim that I wanted to help you. I know otherwise good people can suffer horrible lapses in judgment, can be so blinded by scars that they can’t see what’s right.” He cupped Loki’s cheek. “I believe in second chances. Every day I look at you and see someone turning his life around. Someone I love with my whole heart.”

“Oh, Bruce,” said Loki, shivering, chilled despite the heat.

“Poor Loki,” said Bruce gently, holding him close. “Let’s go for a swim.”

“I was thinking we could go drown those cats in the Hudson.”

Bruce squeezed a handful of Loki’s ass cheek and sat up. “I have a better idea. Let’s swim, and then tomorrow we’ll donate the cats to SAFE.”

“What’s that?”

“Stuffed Animals For Emergencies. It’s a charity. They collect new and gently used stuffed animals and distribute them to emergency organizations, children’s services, hospitals, and homeless shelters who then give them to children in traumatic situations. Having something soft to hold can soothe children who are hurt or afraid.”

“So,” said Loki slowly, “we’ll be turning a thoughtless joke into something that actually helps people.”

“Very small, very innocent people.” Bruce took his hand and pulled him toward the door. They passed the bag of cats on their way to the pool entrance, and Loki was struck by the difference Bruce’s suggestion had made. Instead of seeing a bag of carelessness and cruelty, he imagined each cat comforting a distressed child. There was something magical about the transformation. Filled with hope and awe, Loki entered the water.

***

Loki hadn’t quite known what to expect when Bruce pulled him up to the roof of their apartment building, but it certainly hadn’t been a metal fire pit ringed by a cooler, a cardboard box, a cloth shopping bag, and some blankets. He couldn’t mask his dismay. “We’re camping on the roof?”

“Of course not.” Bruce motioned him to a blanket and began trying to start a fire.

“It’s Christmas Eve. I thought we were going to watch movies. And eat popcorn. Inside.”

“We can do that later.” Bruce seemed to be constructing some sort of elaborate tunnel with the twigs in the fire pit. Only the newspaper he had brought burned.

“Right, why would we want to snuggle on our nice warm couch when we can huddle around a can of burning garbage on the roof?”

Bruce frowned and burned more paper. “This usually works…” Loki gave an impatient wave and the fire roared to life. Bruce grinned at him. “Thanks, Loki.”

Loki shrugged.

“I wanted to surprise you with this on Winter Solstice, but I had trouble getting everything together. I know it’s late, but I hope it’s okay.”

“Wait,” said Loki, feeling uneasy. “What are we doing?”

“We’re celebrating Yuletide. Happy Yuletide!”

“Bruce, I’m going to need alcohol for this.”

“You can have some now.” He fished a bottle and some plastic stemware from the cooler.

“What is that?” Loki leaned toward him as he opened the bottle.

Bruce beamed. “Mead. I also brought Belgian ale, but mead is traditional, isn’t it?” He handed Loki a glass of mead and opened the cardboard box. “And here’s our Yule log.” He displayed it for Loki’s inspection.

Loki caressed the bark. “Birch,” he said softly.

“I looked up the symbolism,” said Bruce, rather eagerly. He seemed quite pleased with himself. “Birch, for new beginnings.”

Loki’s mouth ached as he drank a large sweet swallow of mead. “It also represents fertility.”

Bruce laughed. “Obviously, that doesn’t apply to us.”

Loki bit his tongue. A god’s secrets were best doled out over time.

“Help me put it on the fire?”

“Traditionally, the master of the hearth--” He blinked at Bruce, suddenly realizing the significance of the question. “It’s really your apartment.”

“It’s our apartment now… I was thinking, after we take down the Christmas decorations, we should do some redecorating. You should pick out some things—make the apartment look more like you. It’s ours, and it should look like we both live there.”

Loki grabbed his scientist and kissed him roughly. “I love you,” he said, coming up for air. “And I love that you said that to me while holding a big piece of wood.”

Bruce laughed and, together, they added the log to the fire pit, stirring embers into the darkening sky.

“Yeah,” said Bruce as they settled onto the blankets to watch the fire burn, “I read it’s bad luck to buy the log. You’re supposed to either harvest it from your land or receive it as a gift. So I asked Tony for a piece of birch. He thought I was weird, but he’s been enjoying saying he gave me wood for Christmas.”

Loki snorted.

Bruce sat up suddenly. “Shit! I almost forgot the sacrifices.” He fussed with some zippers on the cooler and brought out a bag. After digging through the bag for a moment, he gave two frosted animal crackers to Loki. “So, I guess we’re supposed to sacrifice a goat and a boar, but what about a giraffe and a hippo? Will those do?”

Loki stared at Bruce for a long, silent moment. “They’ll do.”

“Oh, good. Because it’s really all about symbolis-- Wait! Shouldn’t we feed those to the fire?”

Loki bit the head off the other cookie. “Your ancients would have offered these sacrifices to us. Gods don’t generally make sacrifices to themselves.”

“Right. That makes sense. You’re not offended are you?”

“No. These are great sacrifices. They have sprinkles.” He grabbed the bag and devoured a few more sacrificial animal crackers. He cocked his head at Bruce, who was watching him eat. Loki waved a green cookie at Bruce. “I hereby declare you the honorary god of patience, and offer you this otter.”

“I think that’s an alligator.”

“Whatever.” Loki tipped the bag into his mouth.

“Hey, Loki, don’t fill up on sacrifices. I brought a Yule feast.”

Loki scowled at him. “You don’t eat boar. Or even ham.”

Bruce handed him a package of links. “No. But soy sausage is vegetarian. I thought we could roast them over the fire. I brought skewers.”

Loki tried to imagine Odin’s reaction to such a suggestion. He nodded, delighted.

“I guess we should offer our regrets and wishes before cooking, though.” Bruce handed two index cards and a pen to Loki.

“What’s this for?”

Somewhat crestfallen, Bruce said, “Fucking internet. I knew I should have asked Thor--”

“Fuck Thor!” Loki snarled. He reined himself in because Bruce had drawn back. “This isn’t Asgard. This is Midgard. And this is our Yuletide. However we want to celebrate it is right.” He nuzzled against Bruce’s hand as it stroked his face. “Now,” he said after a short sigh, “what do I do with these cards?”

“On one card, you write whatever regrets you want to give to the darkness. On the other, you write your wishes for the coming year. We’ll burn both of them in the Yule fire.”

“And the smoke will carry our intentions to Asgard,” said Loki in a hushed voice, rubbing his arms.

Bruce shrugged. “If that’s what you choose to believe.” He refilled Loki’s empty glass.

Loki contemplated the flames for a moment, then filled out his index cards. He smiled as Bruce looked up from finishing his. “I’ll go first,” said Loki. “I regret nothing. Nothing! Absolutely nothing. Fuck you, Allfather!” He laughed at himself.

Bruce stared at him with an expression of somber fear. “I thought these were supposed to be private. I thought we were burning them. I didn’t think we were reading them.”

“Well… I read mine. So, now you have to read yours.”

“I don’t want to read mine,” said Bruce.

Bruce’s secretiveness startled and infuriated him. “You’re the one who’s always saying we should be open with each other. What are you hiding? What—did you say some even more terrible things about me behind my back? Or is it something else? Something worse? How dare you, Robert Bruce Banner! How dare you--”

Grim-faced, Bruce handed Loki his regret, the index card folded neatly in thirds.

Loki’s hackles fell into place as he read aloud, “I regret every moment I passed without Loki.”

Bruce winced and hid his face behind his clasped hands. “I thought these were private. Between us and the universe. I’m sure I have other regrets--that was the only one that came to me.” He exhaled. “I know it’s corny. It’s even cornier when you read it out loud.”

“Does corny mean heart-meltingly sweet?”

“No.”

“Then it isn’t corny.” Loki clutched the card to his chest and couldn’t say anything for a moment. “What does the other one say?”

Bruce gave it to him with a sigh.

Loki unfolded it carefully. “I wish for more wishes and more days with Loki.” Loki grinned. He waved his own card in Bruce’s face.

Bruce took it and frowned at the runes. “I can’t read that.”

Loki snatched it from his hands. “It says, ‘I wish for more wishes and Yule with Bruce every year.”

“God of lies. It says you wish for more wishes, some Prada slippers, a Canadian television station, a new army, and a dancing bear named Watson.”

Loki frowned. “What would I do with Prada slippers?” He shook his head. “Look.” He leaned forward, displaying the card. “See? That’s your name in runes. It looks similar to your name in English, doesn’t it?”

Bruce nodded.

Utterly pleased with himself, Loki sat back with their cards. “We both wished for more wishes!”

“It really is the thinking man’s first wish,” said Bruce.

Loki fed his cards to the flames. “I don’t regret anything because—all of the things I’ve done—somehow they led me here.” He handed Bruce’s cards to him and watched the scientist partake in a ritual that had nothing to do with science. Loki sighed happily. “You love me.”

Bruce watched him for a long moment. “I love you,” he confirmed finally, then turned his gaze to the flames.

“What about our presents?” said Loki. “Did you bring them?”

Bruce laughed. “Yes. Do you want to open them now?”

“Now is always the best time for presents.”

Bruce pulled the packages out of the cloth shopping bag. He gave two to Loki and kept one for himself. Loki already had his first one opened while Bruce was still fussing with his ribbon. “A Human Rights Campaign shirt,” said Loki softly. Bruce had introduced him to the concept of gay pride. In Midgard, in the city he had once hoped to vanquish, he was able to be himself. Loki stroked the letters that read, ‘love conquers hate.’

“You liked mine so much, I thought you should have your own. In black, of course—and eco-friendly.”

“I love it!” Loki snuggled close to Bruce and kissed him.

“Open the other one,” Bruce told him.

Loki ripped off the bow and stuck it on Bruce’s head, then tore into the package. “Ice skates!” he laughed.

“So now you don’t have to complain about your feet touching the—what was it? ‘Common feet of unwashed thousands?’ I think that’s what you were shouting at the rental counter.”

“The only common feet I like touching are yours.”

“Thanks, Loki.”

Loki hugged him. “So, this means we can go ice skating as much as I want?”

“It is free in Bryant Park right now.”

“You still haven’t opened yours.”

Loki watched Bruce carefully peel apart the tape. “It’s not a bomb, Bruce. It’s a fucking present.”

Finally, Bruce revealed-- “Boxer briefs. In green and grey… I can either be in the army or prison. That’s sexy. And very practical. Thank you, Loki.”

Loki scowled. “They’re magical underwear.” When Bruce stared in bewilderment, Loki explained. “I know you’re kind of shy. You have no reason to be, but I can understand feeling that way. Whenever you shift from Hulk to you, you’re nude. And I hate to think of you somewhere off with the Avengers, somewhere unfamiliar—maybe by yourself, disoriented and vulnerable. I experimented with some different spells, and I can’t do much about the disoriented or vulnerable parts. But I spelled this underwear to grow and shrink with you, so at least you won’t be nude. I thought that might make you feel a little better.”

Bruce’s eyes shimmered in the firelight. He blinked and swallowed, then whispered, “Loki, that’s the nicest, most thoughtful present anyone has ever given me.”

Loki felt as if he could out glow the fire. He all but purred as Bruce pulled him close and began to devour his mouth. “Of course,” said Loki, drawing back, “we can still play army and prison.”

“Good.” Bruce grinned, leaning in for a peck. “Those are my favorite reindeer games.”

Loki arched back. “I thought I was your favorite Reindeer Games.”

“You’re my favorite everything. Hey, I almost forgot--” He began to pull something from his pocket, then stopped, frowning. “No, that’s going to be all wrong isn’t it? I can’t believe I fucked this up so badly. What was the significance of Yuletide in Asgard? How did you celebrate it?”

“The point was to praise Odin. It was a day of tributes to Odin, mandatory feasting, games of strength. Basically, sucking up, getting a stomachache, and watching Thor win everything. I hated it.”

“Oh,” said Bruce, in the sympathetic singsong Loki loved, “poor Loki. Here, it meant welcoming the return of the sun. Winter solstice is the shortest day of the year, the longest night. But it marks a turning point. Each day after that gains more light, until summer arrives.” He grinned. “I thought this Beatles song might work as a Yuletide carol.”

Loki closed his eyes as Bruce inserted buds into his ears with sensual strokes of each lobe. A sweet little song with notes cheerful as gilt-edged pink clouds filled his head. He opened his eyes to find Bruce stoking the fire, raising embers into the night while the song promised, “Here comes the sun…”

When the song was over, Loki gave the earbuds to Bruce. He wrinkled his brow. “What was the definition of corny exactly?”

“It means whoever says it gets tickled.” He pounced and was all over Loki in one yoga-limber heartbeat. Loki enjoyed the assault and endured it until he was breathless. He lay, partway on blanket and partway on concrete, with Bruce on top of him. Bruce smoothed back Loki’s hair. “I didn’t realize you hated Yuletide. I should have asked.”

“I love our Yuletide,” said Loki. He grinned up at Bruce. “Our first Yuletide.”

Bruce gave an amused snort and kissed Loki’s lips. “Happy Yuletide, Loki.”

“Happy Yuletide, Bruce,” said Loki and pulled Bruce into his mouth, the world behind his closed eyelids full of sunlight and song.

The End

  


**Author's Note:**

> The organizations mentioned in this story, Human Rights Campaign and SAFE, are real. I admire them and believe Loki and Bruce would, too.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Hugs, Apologies, Snow](https://archiveofourown.org/works/6012793) by [auntieomega](https://archiveofourown.org/users/auntieomega/pseuds/auntieomega), [IceNChrome](https://archiveofourown.org/users/IceNChrome/pseuds/IceNChrome)




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